the fuzzy family
~ CURRENT MEMBERS ~
Executive Director, Class of 2025
Born in the town of Shrewsbury "Snoozebury" Massachusetts, Maxfield Evers; or as his friends call him, Max; or how his EVEN CLOSER friends call him, Maxfield, does not know how punctuation works. An avid tangentially-French person, you can see him walking at an uncomfortably brisk pace and owning an above average amount of scarves. At night, his eyes glow, rendering him completely blind but especially rad looking with a pair of light-up Sketchers.
Artistic Director, Class of 2025
Dana, who was primed for battle in the ancient lands of Scottsdale, Arizona, was actually born in Las Vegas, though she has been informed that she was not in fact an accident. She is a state certified Google Maps connoisseur and she feasts on the flesh of children, but only on Thursdays. She can either be found in the club, surrounded by suitors, or in the bank, depositing lots and lots of money. She has a boyfriend, but you wouldn't know him because he goes to another school.
Treasurer, Class of 2025
Amalia (parenthesis Molly) Lopkin hails from New Jersey, but like, up north, like not at all near Princeton; she enjoys a wide variety of activities, from eating an entire block of parmesan cheese, to eating an entire bag of cheddar cheese, to knife throwing, and can often be found writing sentences that are much too long and terribly misspelled.
Publicity Chair, Web Master, Class of 2024
John is an animate clump of blond hair from just outside of Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania. He enjoys taking long naps in public spaces, eating excessive amounts of food, and being generally raucous. As Fuzzy Dice’s token athlete, John can be found at any waking moment thrashing around in the deep end of DeNunzio Pool. Please assist him if he stops moving.
Social Chair, Class of 2026
Dane will tell you he is from Los Angeles because it makes him feel unlike other girls, but any rational person from LA will tell you that he is not. If not fulfilling every California stereotype, you will often find him spontaneously dancing to nothing in particular or attempting to bring back the mid-Atlantic accent and infuse the word "innit" into American English. If you quote any lines from Pixar's Up or NBC's Community, he is contractually obligated to love you unconditionally forever.
Alumni Coordinator, Class of 2026
Tyler Wilson comes to us from glistening Connecticut. His favorite pastimes are romanticizing his life, giving unsolicited advice, and being naturally funny. He loves movies but never watches them, likes exercise but cannot bring himself to it, and despises Twitter but is alsways on it. He has a deeply-rooted fear of crustaceans unless they're cooked. When asked how he stays so positve, he answers, "denial."
Secretariat, Class of 2025
Caitlin Durkin is from Santa Monica, California and loves writing about herself and picking favorite items to list for a website. Every few months she sheds all of her skin (like a little lizard) so that she can make accurate mannequins of herself which she dresses up in her clothes to plan outfits for the next morning. She is still working on purchasing a mirror. In her free time, Caitlin enjoys strutting around with a coffee in hand, heels that click-clack, a witch's cackle, and a brain full of entrepreneurial business ideas.
Class of 2024
Chloe “Old Hickory” Satenberg hails from the great city of smog and overpriced smoothies: Los Angeles. She enjoys long walks on the beach, piña coladas, and getting caught in the rain. You can often find her resting peacefully under a willow tree or in the gym bench pressing 225 lbs. Within the orthodontic community, she has received high honors for being “that girl who still wears her retainers every night.”
Class of 2025
Jeffery Chen is from San Mateo, California, but he'll tell you he grew up in Illinois because it makes him feel special. You can often find him humming showtunes, napping, or making spicy content on Youtube (his friends claim it is "mild" at best). Obsessed with self-betterment he initially joined improv because he'd read it as "improve," but he decided to stick around. He was also born 2 months prematurely-- the only time he was ever early to something in his life.
Class of 2027
An accident from London, Christian before it was cool, wannabe film-bro, acutely forosophobic and passionate BATISCOAF (Brits Against The Insane Saline Content Of American Food) campaigner, Elijah Jeshurun Patterson, also known as guttural grunt noise to his friends, has a severe case of RDF (resting depressed face: if anyone has a cure please help him). If you have lost your Elijah, retrace all the blank walls you may have passed while you were with him, as he is probably stuck staring at one of them.
Class of 2027
Shivani Sahu is a four-time EGOT winner/SoundCloud rapper from super super duper duper duper far away in New Jersey. But like really far New Jersey. Like. Super. Far. She initially joined Fuzzy Dice to distract from the fact that she is actually two kids in a trench coat. On a good day, she is 5’2”, but on a really good day she is 7’6”. This is when she is three kids in a trench coat. When she is not making a pained expression while eating waffles messily, she is actively recruiting the fourth kid in a trench coat. Applications currently being accepted. Thank you in advance.
Class of ????
Put down that gosh darn computer and go audition for fuzzy dice, young whippersnapper.listen to your elder!
~ CURRANT MEMBERS ~
Pink Champagne Currant
Ribus Ribrum, Class of 2021
Primarily used for fruit production, this gorgeous plant is a compact, mounding, diciduous shrub that grows 3-5' tall. Yum!
Ribes Nigrum, Class of 2022
Black currants, which grow excellently in sandy loams and forest soils, are known for their enticing aroma and tart flavor. Perfect for jams and jellies!
Unwelcome Presence, Class of Eww
"Stop right there. You're not a currant at all- what do you think you're doing in the currant members section of this website? You don't BELONG here. Get lost, you wrinkly old raisin, before I smack you so hard you turn back into a GRAPE!"
~ OUR ALUMNI ~
We love our alumni! If you're an alumnus/a email John to make sure you're on our mailing list.
2006: David Kaplan*
2008: Will Ellerbe*, George Lace*, Alex Limpaecher*, Mark Bur, Paul Cowgill, Whitney Mosery
2009: Ashley Alexander, Annie Haslam Colquitt
2010: Jessica Taylor
2011: Sam Borchard, Kaitlyn Hamilton, Will Martinez
2012: Louisa Ferguson, Laura Pedersen, Max Rosmarin, Taylor Stewart-Cannon, Eric Wang
2013: LindseyRose Aguero-Sinclair
2014: Nigel Brauser, Lauren Coleman, Sara Figel, Sam Payne, Quintin Sally, Dillon Sharp, Dan Steurer
2015: Kelsea Best, Evan Coles
2016: Angad Anand, Justin "Japes" Poser
2017: Paulina Orillac
2018: Paddy Boroughs, Jessica Quinter, Cat Sharp
2019: Cameron McKenzie, Raina Seyd, Shea Minter, MacLean Collins
2020: Jackson Artis (Director of the Board)
2021: Ben Bollinger, Lowell Hutchinson
2022: Owen Matthews, Jonathan Som
2023: Elias "Mayfig" Mosby